Mary Ellen Stachnik
January 31, 1952 - September 15, 2026
Mary Ellen Stachnik, age 74, of Newark, DE, passed away on September 15, 2026, with her son by her side.
Born on January 31, 1952, in Richmond, VA, she was the daughter of the late Joseph and Pattye McNutt. Mary Ellen grew up in Newark, DE, and graduated from Newark High School. She graduated from the University of Delaware and went on to earn master’s degrees in aeronautical engineering from Virginia Tech and astronomy from Stony Brook University. She worked as an analyst for the government during the Cold War, first at the Naval Surface Warfare Center and later at the Defense Intelligence Agency. After retiring from government work, Mary Ellen led Testex Inc. as CEO for 31 years.
Mary Ellen was a kind person who greeted others with a smile and a hug. She had a passion for art and enjoyed gardening, cooking, and traveling.
Mary Ellen was preceded in death by her husband, Robert “Bob” Stachnik. She is survived by her son, Alexander “Alex” Stachnik.
A visitation for family and friends will be held at 10 a.m. until 11 a.m. on October 1, 2026, at Spicer-Mullikin Funeral Home, 121 W. Park Place, Newark, DE. Interment will be private.
In lieu of flowers, memorial contributions may be made to Doctors Without Borders USA, P.O. Box 5030, Hagerstown, MD 21741-5030 or online by clicking here.
NaomiKranz Seinsoth
My fond memories of sweet Mary Ellen began in the early 1960’s as we rode the bus to school. How dearly Mary Ellen will be missed. We offer our condolences to her dear son Alex of whom she was quite proud! Love, Naomi and son Matt
Archana S. Jain
Alex,
I am so very sorry for your loss. Mary Ellen was a dear friend since I met her as a young college graduate when I started at NSWC. She was my assigned mentor and guided me through many personal and professional scenarios. We became good friends and loved sharing our love of nature and life. She will be dearly missed.
Regards,
Archana and Kamal Jain
Lydia Theys
Mary Ellen was my dear friend, the dearest kind of friend. Our relationship wasn’t built around how often we saw each other or even how often we talked, wrote, texted, or emailed, but by how much we always, and unapologetically, could be our authentic selves with one another.
I met Mary Ellen in grad school at Stony Brook, one of relatively few women in that cement prison-like building then called ESS. Of course, we shared our mutual interest in astronomy, and our mutual disgruntlement with the department—not even a women’s bathroom on the entire astronomy floor! We were, however, very different in personality. Mary Ellen was, in every way, more refined than I and she talked about a fifth as much as I did. But, we clicked.
Mary Ellen taught me many valuable things. That you could be a good student but still take time for your other interests. That you could be a great host without having a lot of stuff. That if you listen to your pet cat, she will eventually tell you her real name. That she could bake better cakes than I could every time. My recipe box still has several special Mary-Ellen-bestowed recipes, one of which comes out every Christmas. She taught me to appreciate gardening. And what an invasive plant species was. This latter lesson came through my gift to her decades ago of some plants. She had already planted them before she realized what they were. I apologized for that so many times, but it could never be enough times.
I have great memories of doing fun things together: An organ concert she knew about in Pennsylvania, visiting her beloved Longwood Gardens, seeing Saturday Night Fever together when it was just out. And one summer in the 70s, she drove up to where I was living on Long Island while John was away on a month-long camping trip in Canada. She and I just drove around in her convertible in the hot sun having a great time doing nothing.
I enjoyed knowing her family. Pattye and Joe were the nicest people and welcomed John and me into their home as if we were their old pals. When she married Bob, I was thrilled. I had always liked Bob and thought how great it was to see two such terrific people together. And, of course, there was the pleasure of watching Alex grow from a little cutie pie into the lovely man he is today.
One day, Mary Ellen called to say that Pattye and Joe were going on a trip, and that Pattye had brought Mary Ellen her Barry Manilow albums to keep safe, just in case the house burned down. We had a good laugh together about it—more than once, in fact. Now, I don’t know what happens to us after we shuffle off. But I would like to think Mary Ellen is enjoying a reunion of the Fox Lane crowd right now. And that Pattye is providing Barry Manilow music for the party.
The biggest thing Mary Ellen taught me was how rare it is to find a friend who fills a hole in your life you never knew was there. Now that she’s gone, that hole is back to stay. I will never not miss her, but I will always be grateful for having known her. The last time I saw her was a year and a half ago. She brought me a beautiful orchid plant, a type I’d never heard of. Right now, it’s getting ready to bloom for the fourth time. It looks like the buds will all be open on October 1, which feels pretty right.
Alex, my deepest sympathies to you and to all who loved her.